The Stress Doc Letter
Cybernotes from the Online Psychohumorist ™
SEP 2009, No. I, Sec. II
Fight when you can
Take flight when you must
Flow like a dream
In the Phoenix we trust!
3-D Group Combat-Intervention at the Burning Out and Burning Up Battlefronts:
Using Discussion-Drawing-Diversity to Disarm Conflict and Build
Camaraderie-Community: Part II
Gallery Walk and Fashion Show (and Tell)
If the size of the audience, time frame and room logistics permit, I initiate a
"Gallery Walk" before "Show and Tell." People are encouraged to meander around
the room or auditorium and view their colleagues' drawings, either on tables or
taped to the walls. However, there is one caveat: "do not discuss your team's
drawings, yet." I want people to eyeball the pictures, to take in the varied
yet often familiar perspectives. Also, walking around the room provides a
physical break. And with everyone milling about, making comments, and laughing
together while viewing the pictures, a sense of community begins to emerge.
After about 5-10 minutes of walk- and talk-about, we are ready for the "fashion
show" part of the program, where each group has a chance to explain its
"creative design" to the larger audience. I ask the groups to "select a
spokesperson and a holder. And don't everybody volunteer to be the holder."
This segment of the exercise encourages each group, through their spokesperson,
to share briefly (usually no longer than a couple of minutes) their team's
verbal and visual story. Sometimes, though, a group may initially decide to
play "Show and Guess," asking the audience to speculate on the imagery or
meaning of their drawing. Other times, a group may turn their "Show" time into
performance art, acting out or singing the message. Again, the time factor is
often the biggest constraint on how much digression, expression or "acting out"
The real value of "Show and Tell" is that it allows people with an intimate
perspective to highlight issues using an insider's knowledge and language. And
the knowing laughter and vigorously nodding heads clearly demonstrate how much
the audience appreciates or resonates with the visuals and stories. (For
audiences in the hundreds, I ask for volunteer teams for "Show and Tell." Even
when I try to limit the numbers, groups keep stepping up. When feasible, people
are happy to extend the program.)
Clearly, stories are a basic tool for cognitive understanding and empathic
connection. According to Daniel Pink, in his book, A Whole New Brain,
most of our thinking and our knowledge are organized as stories. Storytelling
is the ability to place facts in context and to deliver them with emotional
impact. A story blends high concept and high touch. And as the popularity of
comic books attests, stories wedded to visual images can be very engaging and
Post-Exercise Analysis -- Questions and Reflections
Once all groups have completed the fashion show/story time, and I have applauded
the audience for their wonderful energy, effort and designs, I then ask two
questions: "Did you enjoy the exercise? And was the exercise useful? Quickly
establishing the broad level of enjoyment, we have people call out and delineate
its utility. This post-exercise Q & A and discussion contributes to my
identifying factors that helped make the exercise a success. And Part II of
this article will elaborate "Ten Dynamics Underlying the Purpose, Power and
Sense of Play of the 3-D Stress Busting and Team Building Exercise."
1. Sharing Universal Themes. Everyone can readily participate and share
their own stress smoke signals or sources of pressure in a 24/7,
anytime/anywhere, uncertain and lean-and-MEAN world. Invariably, people comment
on the universal or common themes depicted in the drawings. This occurs no
matter how diverse the larger audience (e.g., geographical and cultural
differences among attendees at a national conference) or when the exercise teams
are demographically dissimilar or comprised of members from different
2. Acknowledgement Overcomes Anxiety, Shame or Isolation. People discover
they are not alone when it comes to pressures; they can begin to let down an
"I've got to always be strong" Rambo or Rambette persona. Participants find
real support when being open with folks who have been or still are walking in
the same tight-fitting shoes, and can empathize with the bunions. Remember,
psychology research suggests a variation on the old saw: "Misery doesn't just
like company…it likes miserable company!" Or as I like to say, "Common calluses
make uncommon comrades."
3. Nonverbal Expression and Releasing Aggression. While many adults are
anxious when it comes to drawing, once reassured that stick figures are fine
(recall my being a graduate of the Institute for the Graphically Impaired) they
usually forge ahead. And by doing so, folks rediscover how emotions, especially
frustration and anger, can be playfully drawn out with colored markers and large
flipchart paper. Nothing like putting a tail and horns on a devil of a boss to
put things in a less frightening perspective and to evoke a stress relieving
4. Laughing at Others' and Our Own Flaws and Foibles. Just a little
exaggeration can tickle some knowing laughs, especially from folks feeling on
the edge. And, of course, laughing itself is a real stress reliever. As Dr.
David Fry, humor expert observed, "Laughing with gusto is like turning your body
into a big vibrator giving vital organs a brief but hardy internal massage."
This "inner jogging" releases mind calming and mood uplifting chemicals like
Endorphins and Dopamine.
Some admit they laugh so not to cry. And no other than the pioneering comedic
and film genius, Charlie Chaplin would agree. As Chaplin observed, "A
paradoxical thing about making comedy is that it is precisely the tragic which
arouses the funny. We have to laugh due to our helplessness in the face of
natural forces and in order not to go crazy."
Others say they laugh at their lack of drawing skills, but these folks usually
admit they had fun. Finally, I pose another possible source of laughter: "You
know the person that says, 'You don't seem to realize, I really am as important
as I think I am.' You want to stick in a pin and deflate that big ego balloon.
And the drawing exercise gives you the opportunity poke at people and situations
that deserve some lampooning." Yet all agree that the exercise is not
mean-spirited. There was too much good energy and a sense of fun for that.
Perhaps, Sigmund Freud, himself captured the value of placing things or poking
people in a lighter, even somewhat absurd, perspective. For the "Father of
Psychoanalysis," philosophical humor, the highest defense mechanism, boldly
declares: "Look here! This is all this seemingly dangerous world amounts to.
Child's play - the very thing to jest about."
5. Envisioning "The Big Picture" and a Diverse Perspective. As mentioned
earlier, I try to create diverse teams, for example, having people from
different departments in the same organization working together. The reason is
obvious: "Ever hear someone in your organization say something like, 'I thought
it was only our department being disrupted by the recent operational change'?"
This exercise literally helps all participants get beyond the silos and see "the
big picture" while making it easier to get on the same page and field of
And there's a less obvious value added. While attacking problems in a diverse
group may be frustrating and time consuming, the process may motivate more
complex conceptualizing and yield a higher order synthesis. I recall a study of
small group problem-solving involving seamen on a submarine. The most diverse
groups predictably achieved higher levels of creativity in their problem-solving
strategies and solutions. Reconciling diversity and seeming contradiction
resists easy answers. However, as a result of this challenge, if the team
sustains this complex problem-solving effort multiple perspectives and resources
as well as myriad designs and plans may come to fruition. Invariably, the group
breaks out of comfortable assumptions or habitual behavior patterns to imagine
new connections among disparate elements and to evolve a fresh
consensus-building big picture.
6. Generating Creativity. Invariably, there's an "Amen and Women" chorus
when I ask, "Did we see some creativity?" I remind people not to confuse
drawing talent with the wonderfully fresh and imaginative visual metaphors that
have been produced. Everyone is also aware of the great energy in the room. I
liken it to a jazz riff: people are bouncing ideas and images off each other.
Also, people have said that they really like the drawing part of the exercise
because it seems to challenge them to use a different part of their brain, that
is, to think of the professional-organizational issues from more than just an
analytical perspective. The power of "interactive imagination" comes to life.
7. Experiencing Open Interaction and Team Synergy. All readily agree the
groups quickly transformed into teams. There is a division of labor. The
exercise allows participants to find a comfortable niche, whether this involves
verbalizing and/or visualizing the issues. And as previously noted the power of
team emerges when people realize not everyone has to take the lead or the
initiative. For example, once one member articulates a concept or image that
makes sense, even those initially uncomfortable with the coloring part of the
exercise can get on (the drawing) board. Many times I've witnessed a hesitant
individual morph into an eager contributor.
Perhaps the most valuable problem-solving aspect of these exercises is that no
group member has "the one right answer." Everyone's responses are valuable.
Both verbally and nonverbally one person's suggestions will readily trigger
ideas and images that stimulate a colleague while embellishing the group design
and strengthening the team process. The final product is an amalgam of group
ideas and images.
8. Managing Truth, Building Trust and Providing an Invaluable Assessment Tool.
If it occurs, one piece of group process requires some "fair and balanced"
commentary. For example, there are times during "show and tell" when an
employee-spokesperson focuses on a particular source of stress and, not
surprisingly, the target is likely to be "management." Conversely, when a
program is geared to supervisors and managers, "employees" may get caught in the
verbal-visual crosshairs. Who has absolute truth? Obviously, no one has. Of
course, there are individual employees and managers who are "stress carriers"
and need to be engaged if not confronted and even disciplined. (You know the
definition of a stress carrier: someone who doesn't get ulcers just
gives them.) However, my primary goal is to help both sides better appreciate
the other's challenges and demands. I want employees to better understand some
of the external or higher level pressures that the managers face; I want
managers to better appreciate the daily grind in the trenches.
Not surprisingly, many of the drawings poke fun or have an edge. Occasionally I
need to remind management that such venting is not a sign of disrespect, but may
reflect the need to blow off some steam with people who understand each other's
pressures, passion and pain. This is especially natural when you are asking
people to still perform at high levels in the face of budget or staff cuts or
other signs of reorg tension. However, a mean-spirited atmosphere is quite
rare; to the contrary, people are usually amazed to discover that they can be
laughing and sharing such good energy while talking about workplace issues that
usually have them feeling resigned or worked up.
And there's one vital seemingly "unexpected" result: when employees perceive
that management can handle their need to vent and provide some genuine feedback,
even some "bad news," and that management doesn't get uptight, defensive or
vindictive, then the exercise strengthens the level of trust in the
organization. And I always affirm a management team that brings me in knowing
the program will definitely be "out of the box" if not a bit "out-rage-ous."
Finally, I underscore how the pictures are a truly valuable resource. One CEO
remarked, "I get written reports all the time, but these pictures have given me
more useful operational info than anything else that's come across my desk." Or
as a Commander of an army brigade observed: "Our "drawing" exercise was
absolutely enlightening. I cannot tell you how valuable it was to me as the
"CEO" to see these products and see how the differing sections and commands
9. Highlighting the Power of Time. As mentioned above, I usually allot
7-10 minutes each for the discussion and drawing segments of the program. I
also provide periodic reminders, such as "three more minutes" or "last
flourishing touches." Why such an emphasis on the time element; what is the
method to being a maddening nag? As participants note, time pressure is a daily
reality. And time pressure helps people drive for the goal line, especially if
key dynamics are at play.
But before providing an explanation, let me place this time-goal dynamic in the
context that can maximize the effect. I find people/groups tend to be the most
productive-creative when they have a "good question/problem" to solve. A good
problem-solving task is often one that suggests a broad desired outcome and lets
the group come up with its own signature solution. Clearly, the stress drawings
do just that. And when you combine such factors as people having sufficient
skills and resources, valuing imagination over artistic execution, along with
having a good problem to solve, and participants are acutely aware of the time
constraints…well, you definitely are generating some "good stress," energizing
and driving folks to the finish line. (Some groups are so motivated or
competitive they hardly want to stop. Naturally I quip that, "You know which
people wouldn't put down their pens during that 7th grade math test.")
Finally, a link is made between time realities and the need to forsake the
pursuit of perfection. Periodically, I remind groups that there isn't a whole
lot of time for fine prototyping in pencil. People have to "jump in" and act
out their emotions and draw out their discussion ideas using the markers and
flip chart paper. Actually, the time limits only underscore the sense of
surprise regarding the imaginative if not artistic quality of the pictures:
"Wow, we did all this in just twenty minutes!" And when everyone signs their
name to the picture, you know there is a sense of team ownership.
10. Encouraging a Dynamic Close: Discovering the "Inner Child" and a Feeling
of Community. There's a two step process for completing the exercise: a) it
takes little prompting to get the audience to acknowledge the enjoyment in
sharing their designs with colleagues: "Hey, most of us have that inner six
year-old waiting to leap out." Then, while holding up an imaginative drawing I
fairly shout, "Hey mom, look what I did today!" and b) I close with a
question-observation: "Is it just me, or do we all detect a greater sense of
community in the room?" The nodding heads and energetic applause underscore the
obvious. Again, affirming the energy and creativity in the room, I end on a
passionate note: "Sure the (organizational) boat has some holes. But it's our
boat. And if we pull together we can make some repairs and get the boat moving
again with renewed energy, direction and commitment."
Finally, depending on time availability, I try to add an exercise segment that
builds a bridge between problem-identification and strategic recommendations.
Two teams join together and extract one or two key issues from their two
pictures. Then the large group brainstorms some strategic "next steps." I
encourage the selection of issues that have a reasonable chance of being tackled
within the resources and realities of their workplace. The blended teams
present their ideas to the collective; the latter then provides commentary and
critique. Where appropriate, I also encourage groups to bring back their
pictures to their in-house teams (or sometimes even their families) and continue
the creative problem solving process. Or the organization can form a matrix
("Save the Retreat") team, and representatives from all roles and levels in the
organization can continue the strategic problem solving process.
This article has presented a stress reducing, morale enhancing and team building
exercise that works, whether the audience members are momentarily under siege or
facing a chronically hazardous work environment. It also resonates with
participants attending a national conference and wanting to strengthen a sense
of professional identification and unity. First we outlined "Five Steps for
Turning 3-D (Discussion-Drawing-Diversity) Danger into Opportunity":
1. Making It Safe
2. Allowing for Multiple Sensory Channels and Comfort Levels
3. Overcoming Confusion and Resistance through Group Dynamics, Ego and Targeted
4. Generating Big Picture Metaphor Power
5. Transforming Barriers into Bridges
Next we elaborated "Ten Dynamics Underlying the Purpose, Power and Sense of
Play of the 3-D Stress Busting and Team Building Exercise":
1. Sharing Universal Themes
2. Acknowledgement Overcomes Anxiety, Shame or Isolation
3. Nonverbal Expression and Releasing Aggression
4. Laughing at Others' and Our Own Flaws and Foibles
5. Envisioning "The Big Picture" and a Diverse Perspective
6. Generating Creativity
7. Experiencing Open Interaction and Team Synergy
8. Managing Truth, Building Trust and Providing an Invaluable Assessment Tool
9. Highlighting the Power of Time
10. Encouraging a Dynamic Close: Discovering the "Inner Child" and a Feeling
Here is an individual and collective high-octane exercise for transforming
workplace pressures into supportive and synergistic processes and products. And
you have a blueprint for bringing back this robust learning experience into
everyday operations and meetings, to help yourself and others…Practice Safe
1) Federal Asian Pacific American Counicl (FAPAC) -- Southwest Chapter/San Diego
[1-hour closing presentation on "A Leader's Greatest Gift -- TLCs: Inspiring
Trust, Laughter and Creative Collaboration"; 60 attendees]
Sep 15, 2009
Mr. Mark Gorkin,
On behalf of FAPAC Southwest Officers and from all the attendees of our
Leadership Seminar last Saturday, 12 September 2009, I would like to extend our
heartfelt thanks for your outstanding and enlightening training experience.
Everyone in attendance had a great time and gained valuable knowledge on how to
deal with stress and how to lead and manage personnel in a stressful
environment. Additionally, the various exercises you provided helped build
teamwork. I am sure that everyone would be able to use the valuable tools they
gained from this seminar in their day to day working environment.
Thank you so much and we look forward to working with you again in the
LCDR "JB" Baluyot
Assistant Supply Officer
Aviation Supply Department
(619)545-3246 cmml, 735-3246 dsn
CEO FAPAC Southwest
2) Federal Asian Pacific American Council -- DC Chapter Meeting
[45 minute program on "A Leader's Greatest Gift -- TLCs: Inspiring Trust,
Laughter and Creative Collaboration"]
Sep. 3, 2009
Again, I would like to personally thank you for taking time to give FAPAC
members a wonderful session yesterday at our general meeting. You have the
magic of engaging the audience. We benefited and enjoyed your session.
Marina Milton, CPA
FAPAC 2009 Program Chair
Mark Gorkin, MSW, LICSW, "The Stress Doc" ™, a Licensed Clinical Social
Worker, is an acclaimed keynote and kickoff speaker and "Motivational Humorist"
known for his interactive, inspiring and FUN speaking and workshop programs. In
addition, the "Doc" is a team building and organizational development consultant
for a variety of govt. agencies, corporations and non-profits. Mark is an
Adjunct Professor, No. VA (NOVA) Community College and currently he is leading
"Stress, Team Building and Humor" programs for the 1st Cavalry and 4th Infantry
Divisions, Ft. Hood, Texas and Fort Leonard Wood, MO. He is also delivering
webcasts for the national Institute for Paralegal Education. A former Stress
and Conflict Consultant for the US Postal Service, the Stress Doc is the author
of Practice Safe Stress and of The Four Faces of Anger. See his award-winning,
USA Today Online "HotSite" -- www.stressdoc.com -- called a "workplace
resource" by National Public Radio (NPR). For more info on the Doc's
"Practice Safe Stress" programs or to receive his free e-newsletter, email
email@example.com or call 301-875-2567.
(c) Mark Gorkin 2009
Shrink Rap™ Productions